dim, but undeniable

feeling much better today. sore throat's gone.


i may just be able to find my path in life. when in doubt, always ask. and ask, i did. i talked to tiffany, i talked to bernard (jess), i talked to vincent, i talked to riz (he was not much help), i talked to hanjie, i talked to fatimah (huisi), i talked to yiling.


some talked about switching of course to Accounting & Finance, others talked about securing the First Class. up till now, though, i've no idea whether the degree title matters more, or the class does. vincent felt that A&F was way better than B&F esp since the banking system has collasped. in fact, financial intermediation can be done without. but if i really do switch courses now, my year 3 will be such a killer. facing joanna almost 24/7 will kill me - or not.


i may discover that she teaches well, like how i discovered vincent's ability at his last lesson with us. i detested him for his bragging. in fact, all his actions and words were very detestable. but somehow, at the last lesson, something he said clicked with me and all the dislike instantly evaporated.


with that, i finally saw all the effort he had put in. as well as the immense knowledge that he has. how sad, i discovered it at the last lesson. better late than never, right? and so, i shocked the whole world when i went to school just to talk to vincent. and it took me so much willpower not to ask about his part time students, HAHAHAH.


the only reason why i'm so panicky about the future is simply 'cuz i want to live, not to survive. with this goal kept in mind, i'm sure the path can be carved out. that is, if i do not lose sight of my goal.


then there're so many things to do, yet so many tomorrows to come. i need to start living.